Thursday, March 14, 2013

The Road Ahead

Usually when a couple breaks up you tend to hear apologies and that you were too good for that person.  But when it's a couple giving things a second chance and there really isn't a damn thing that can truly be said.  Only a handful of people can truly understand the situation.

Me?

I'm still trying to make sense of it, but not as much.  I try to keep my mind on other things, like the fact that I am 15 credits away from my college degree.

As I said before, I really can't get too much into what happened.  Most importantly, I want to respect the privacy of my ex.  One thing she taught me was the value of privacy in a relationship.  I really wanted to show off photos on my Facebook of the woman I was so in love with, and nothing else more.

But c'est la vie.

We've spoken briefly, there's still some stuff we need to hammer out.  Truth is, I don't mind being friends with her, but also, I am in the mindset of moving on.

Personally, I feel that I am not emotionally ready for another relationship.  I didn't think I was with my ex.  The truth is that I was scared of dating again.  I was scared of fucking up really badly and hurting her.  But I also felt that if I dive into this, the is the relationship that this was going to be it.  So much for that, lol.

I do feel like dating and seeing where things go, and if it happens, then yeah.  I still feel timid as ever.  I want to force myself into the swing of things and enjoy it all, but I just don't have the will power I suppose.  I never did have the best self-confidence in the world.  Yeah, I can flirt, talk, make a girl blush, and make her feel happy and a million bucks, but ya know.

I think that right now, I'm going to focus on graduating from college, letting things fall into place and walk to the beat of my own path and see where life takes me.

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